Under The Bordeaux Sun

(Editor: So much for worrying about copyright infringement.

Writer: On a good day, maybe 300 people read the blog.  I don’t think Frances Mayes, the writer of “Under the Tuscan Sun” has anything to worry about.)

After checking into our hotel, Carol and I headed out to explore the city of Bordeaux.  Until I started planning for our free time in Bordeaux, I didn’t realize there is as much to see as there actually is.  Before leaving on the trip, I made a list of nine highlights to see, and, as it turns out, there’s even more to see.

I didn’t realize for the longest time that the heart of the city of Bordeaux is a large UNESCO World Heritage site, and that there are three UNESCO churches in the city.  

(Editor: Remember readers, you heard it here first, “UNESCO means you must go!”

Writer: Thanks for advertising my saying.  And people, read it aloud to your self – “U-NES-CO means you must go.  See how it cleverly rhymes?  Some day UNESCO is going to give me a major award for coming up with that saying.)

First Carol and I celebrated by having a drink at the rooftop bar and staring at all the church spires of the city, as well as at the Gironde River, visible from a few blocks away.

And then we got down to being Iron Tourists in Bordeaux.  We started out down Rue Saint Catherine, the main shopping street in the city.  It was packed with people and exuded a festive air.  I knew immediately and instinctively we were going to like Bordeaux, and not just the wine, but the city as well.

Rue du St. Catherine -- one

of the best pedestrian street

we've ever seen.

Our first stop was to the Cathedral Saint-Andre Bordeaux, a 17th century creation that is as amazing on the inside as it is on the outside.  Besides being a key early stop on the Camino, the cathedral also has a bell tower separated from the cathedral by a good hundred feet or so.  Given the geology of Bordeaux, the builders were afraid the added weight of the Bell Tower would cause it to sink, bringing the connected church down with it.

The Cathedral tower, built

unattached to the Cathedral

for safety and stability.

Mary and Jesus high atop the

Cathedral Tower.

Rose windows even look

great from the outside.

With their hats, these guys mitre be bishops.

Strong "above the door carvings"

game for this cathedral.

Solid rose window.

Trying to up my "take cool pictures of

the church ceiling" game.  Good start.

View from behind the altar

all the way down to the

other end of the cathedral.

From there, we went to the Grosse Cloche, one of the remaining city tower gates from the 18th Century.  There we were asked for help by an older Welshman and his London wife for help.  They were quite pleased that I happened to have an extra map, and could forward my list of Things To Do In Bordeaux list to them.  They are also big fans of Welcome to Wrexham, which is a fantastic documentary series.

The Grosse Cloche is one of

the oldest belfries in France.

Grosse Cloche selfie.

The bell was cast in 1775.  It

rings 18 times a year, six times

for major holidays, and twelve

times on the first Sunday of

the month.

We took in an arch down by the river, and right next to the Pont du Pierre, a bridge finished in 1819 by order of Napoleon.  Legend has it that it had 14 arches to honor the fact that Napoleon Bonaparte’s name has 14 letters.  But since the original plan Napoleon approved had nineteen arches, that story is unlikely.  

The iconic bridge Napoleon had built.

We searched and found a church Carol wanted to see, but not only was the tower closed, but so was the church.  Oh well.

We walked to another of the

handful of the remaining

city gates.  This had the iconic

scallop shells embedded by it,

indicating it was a route on

the Camino de Santiago

de Compostela.

From there, we walked along the Gironde River bank to the Place de la Bourse, the heart of the UNESCO site.  This stock exchange was built between 1730 and 1775 and is quite a handsome pair of matching buildings, with the Fountain of the Three Graces set out front.

Built in the 18th century (the fountain, not us).

The water mirror.  The fun

people are having gives one

something to reflect on.

Across the street by the river is the affecting Mirror d’eau (“water mirror” for readers whose French is on par with mine).  It is a rectangle shaped, very thin sheet of water.  Lots of kids and adults were playing in the water.  

The adults were mostly walking barefoot through it, while a number of the kids were laying down on the water and propelling themselves across parts of it.  The Mirror d’eau is clearly a popular addition to the waterfront.  On a hot day, playing in water sparks joy.

From there we headed back to the hotel to first clean up and then meet up with Don and Jennifer for dinner.  It was a good introduction to the city of Bordeaux.

"Waiter, Bring Us Some Fresh Wine."

This post's headline is a Steve Martin line from his classic movie, “The Jerk.”  I’m not going to explain it to you here, but I am going to explain why I’m referencing wine.

Croatia was added as a pre-trip to an already planned Bordeaux river cruise (I know, it’s NOT the Bordeaux River, but the point is to visit the Bordeaux wine region.)

So, after Split, Maddy flew to Italy to meet up with friends (she starts her job at a law firm in early October), while Carol and I flew to Bordeaux, France via Amsterdam to visit the best region in the world for wine – Bordeaux.

You know you've arrived at the

Bordeaux Airport  when you are

greeted by the largest of

wine bottles.

I was never interested in wine until one night in the early 2000s.  Carol and I went to dinner with friends at an independent Arlington steakhouse called “Ray’s The Steaks.”  After talking with us about our order (rib-eyes, medium-rare, which is the only way to cook and eat steak), Mike the owner (“Ray” was the nickname a girlfriend had given him, which means either she wasn’t very creative or she had weird daddy issues, but I liked Mike and wasn’t going to ask him which reason it was).

I leveled with him.  “I’ve got no idea what to order.  I usually don’t drink wine, and frankly am intimidated by wine.”  He recommend a SuperTuscan (which I’d never heard of before) named “Terrabianca.”  

Well, that bottle of wine totally changed my attitude about wine.  Both of my brothers were long-time wine snobs, talking about “mouth feel,” “aroma of pencil shavings and cow pies,” “drinking wine from a glass not made by Riedel crystal is like drinking Mad Dog 2020,” and other such nonsense.  I was old school Tom T. Hall – “I Like Beer.”

After the bottle of Terrabianca, I started buying and consuming other Italian reds, then moved on to wines of other countries.  Oh, I don’t talk about “mouth feel” (and you shouldn’t either) and I rarely discern aromas in wine.  I just know that when I taste wine, I know what I like and don’t like.  People who think I know a lot about wine ask for my advice, and I usually start with “drink what you like” and end with “try different wine countries/regions and drink what you like.”

I’m partial to Old World wines – Spanish, Italian, and French.  Carol and I make a lot of Spanish food, so that’s probably what we go through the most.  But we also like Oregon Pinot Noirs, Australian reds, and have gone through stages of South African reds, and really enjoyed the Croatian wines we were drinking in Dubrovnik and Split.  I do like to pair wine by country (Spanish wine with Spanish food, Italian wine with Italian food, and so on, or by type of food – Pinot Noirs with chicken or fish, for instance).

(Editor: For a guy who claims he’s not a wine snob, this trip down memory lane is getting awfully self-indulgent!

Writer: Well of course it’s self-indulgent, I’m writing about wine!)

Anyhow, to me, the best wines in the world are produced in Bordeaux.  You may disagree, and you’d be wrong.  And remember, we love Spain and look for any excuse to have Ribero del Duero, a Priorat, or a Rioja.  In fact, these days I have too much stored wine that I’ve stopped buying wine. . .except for Spanish reds, because our Spanish wine collection is running low.

(Editor: Oh, how ever will you cope?

Writer: With more Spanish wine, of course).

For years now I’ve wanted to go to Bordeaux.  Our friends Gene and Cindy Laporta (Laporta means “the gate” in Italian – that would be a cool nickname for a mobster, Gene “The Gate” Laporta) had done a Bordeaux river cruise, and that struck me as the best way to get around that sprawling region.

I’ve even put together groups of guys to pool money and buy Bordeaux futures from 2016, ‘18, and ‘20.  This allows everyone to have many different appellations (regions of , 

So, when our vacation club, Inspirato, released a Bordeaux River cruise option for late August, we signed up, and since members can bring guests, our friends Don and Jennifer Minnis also signed on.

We hadn’t been on an Inspirato cruise since Antarctic in January 2016 and then the Arctic in June of 2018.  Those were fantastic cruises, not only because of how special the destinations were, but because they were so well done.  Now we use Inspirato for either houses or hotels, but we also use VRBOs and Marriott points. 

The timing was pretty ironic, however, as since we signed up, Carol and I are drinking a lot less wine and less often.  Jennifer doesn’t drink red at all, and may have a glass of white or sparkling, while Don has all but quit drinking alcohol.  

So we found ourselves in the wonderful city of Bordeaux with approximately a day and half prior to the cruise. 

One More Time Through Diocletian's Palace

Carol had the smart suggestion to go back to Diocletian's Palace around 4pm, when it was not as crowded, to see Jupiter's Temple, the Cathedral of St. Domnius, the Treasury, and the crypt of Saint Lucia.

The quick version -- Jupiter's Temple: worth it.  The Cathedral of St. Domnius: worth it.  The Treasury: If you have time and inclination.  The Crypt of Saint Lucia: Save a couple of Euros and skip it.

There was not a line to buy tickets, so we waltzed right in and bought tickets.  Maddy skipped buying the crypt (she is often wise beyond her years).

We started by going to Jupiter's Temple/St. John's Baptistery.  Built for Diocletian to worship Jupiter and his other gods, it was repurposed after his death to be a baptistry.  

It's much smaller than I expected.  The feature is a statue of John the Baptist by Ivan Mestrovic.  His work definitely is recognizable, and reminds Carol and I of the great Spanish sculptor, Josep Subirachs

There are other things, albeit not many, to see in the Temple/Bapistry.

Then we went to the Treasury, which includes an eclectic mix of art and treasures from back in the day.  We covered most of it, but we were worried about time to see the Cathedral, so we bugged out early.

The Cathedral is well worth the time.  It is the oldest and smallest building used as a Cathedral anywhere in the Christian faith.  

Originally the mausoleum for Diocletian's body, which was disappeared by Christian celebrating his death after his reign of terror and persecution of their religion.

There are some granite columns and a relief from the original temple.  Diocletian had Bishop Domnius of Salona killed, and now the bishop's sarcophagus occupies Diocletian's mausoleum.  

Maddy climbed the 183 steep steps of the bell tower, and its sweeping views of Split.  Maddy enjoyed the views but also noted that between my knee and Carol's aches and pains, we made the right decision not to go.

While she did that, we explored the pointless crypt.

After the fuller exploration of Diocletian's Palace, we headed to Fife restaurant at the recommendation of our, um, aggressive Uber driver.

He said the local dish there, Pasticada, reminds him of his mother's cooking.  Honestly, we were underwhelmed.  After some great meals in Croatia, this wasn't one of them.  I quipped that it reminded me of his mother's cooking too.

Pasticada, which is tasty gnocchi served

with shoe leather meat and glops of

sauce.  Don't say you haven't been warned.

Well, you can't have everything, so we went to our favorite gelato place and ended on a high note.

(Editor: So I noticed you didn't inject as much humor into the last few blog posts. . .why is that?

Writer: It could have something to do with the finish line of the Croatia blog being in sight.)

Croatia: Done.

Photos From The Last Day -- Mostly Diocletian's Palace

Since we went into areas we hadn't been in Diocletian's Palace, here's one last set of pictures.

Tomb at the entrance

to Jupiter's Temple.

John the Baptist statue by

Croatian sculptor Ivan

Mestrovic, located in the

Temple of Jupiter, repurposed

as St. John's Bapistry.

The half-barrel vaulted ceiling is considered

the best preserved of its kind anywhere.

Close up of a ceiling panel.

Sphinx brought back

from Egypt for Diocletian.

View of St. Domnius bell tower

from Jupiter's Temple.

A scene in the Treasury.

An wooden cross.

A pieta, with a couple of the

apostles.  One of the twelve

is missing.  I wonder

which one?

Psst. . .hey, be a pal and

reattach my arms please.

A fuller view of the bell tower.

Side chapel.

The ceiling above the

side chapel is stunning.

Pope John Paul II, one of the three

people who won the Cold War.

The ceiling of the altar is small,

but absolutely beautiful.

Duck carved into the choir.

It's dark, but pretty cool.

Down in the crypt.  Carol and 

I went so you don't have to go.

You are welcome.

More of the random Roman columns.

Just another cool wall of the palace.

Turning Lemons Into Lemonade

After the unsuccessful 45 minute boat tour, Carol and Maddy suggested an excellent Plan B.  

We went back to the apartment, reloaded, and headed to the Jadran Beach Club to spend the morning, and, as it turns out, much of the afternoon.

It turns out if you are occupying part of the long wall bench, you don't have to pay a fee.  You do have to order drinks, so we started with Coke zero (for Carol) and sparkling water (for me).  

Maddy had already gone swimming.  Because the water is protected by the spit of land, the sea is not rough where we went swimming.  

After a bit, Carol and I went in for a swim (or for a "soak" as they say in St. John, USVI).  After that, we upped our drink orders to beer (for me) and pina coladas (for the ladies).

Swimming was pleasant, the beach was fun, the drinks went perfectly with the sun, all in all it turned out better (and cheaper) than spending the day in a boat on the rough Adriatic.

I went in several times -- the water is so clear I could see the large stones ten feet down like they just below me.  They also had the best swim stairs to get into and out of the water I've ever seen -- each step was nice and wide, and the steps were not straight up/down -- there was a gradual angle so it was easier to get out of the water.

At lunch time, Maddy volunteered to walk to the nearby sandwich shop, and she brought back fine sandwiches for each of us.  They weren't the most impressive sandwiches ever, but they sure hit the spot, along with the can of Pringles Carol had brought along.

It was so pleasant we ended up staying till around 3pm, and made us forget all about the boat trip from heck earlier that morning.  (Calling it the "boat trip from hell" doesn't really work, as it was uncomfortable and not fun, but neither did the boat flip over nor did anyone die.)

(Editor: Good thing you've set out the parameters for the difference between a boat trip from heck and one from hell.

Writer: "Hell" seems overdoing it, whilst "heck" is right on the mark.)

This Is The Worst Trip I've Ever Been On

(Editor: Two "Sloop John B" title references on the same trip!   

Writer: Well, it is the second best Beach Boys song, so it's a natural.)

We did a great four hour boat ride from Dubrovnik to the Elephiti Islands (which I'm pretty sure are spelled differently on every website that references those islands).

But I had also heard from reliable sources, and youngest daughter Torie, that we should be on the water in Split -- either a Blue Lagoon and Five Islands tour, or a Blue Cave and Five Islands tour, or some combination of something blue and some number of islands.

So I booked us on a private boat to the Blue Cave and Five Islands for a full-day excursion.

Well that proved to be a mistake.

(Editor: Not your first mistake

Writer: Nor will it be my last!)

Strike One: The boat was small and had no gear on it for us to use (snorkels, towels, cooler).

Strike Two: The Adriatic Sea was particularly rough that day, with unfair winds and head-on seas.

Strike Three: The longer we were out, the further away our goals seemed to be, as though we were going backwards.

Carol and Maddy got drenched with one big wave (they had already been hit by several, whilst I was feeling fine getting some modest spray).

Our captain turned around, saw the outcome of drenched women, and stopped the boat as we bobbed in the waves.  It turns out the time to get to the Blue Cave went from 30-40 minutes to two and a half hours because of the wind and waves.

I said, "time to cancel."  The captain thought that was a wise idea.  There was more discussion as Carol was worried I'd be upset by cancelling.  I didn't want to spend eight hours with miserable conditions.

What had been such a calm and stunning Adriatic Sea outside of Dubrovnik was a nasty mess outside of Split that took the fun out of it.  And remember, Carol's bruised ribs meant she was frequently being slammed against the boat in pain.

Riding back on the east side of the boat, it was my turn to get soaked.  

We clearly made the right decision -- otherwise it would have been eight hours of suffering on rough seas.

I was able to get a refund for most of the money, with, as is fair, some money withheld for the captain's time and the gas.  

It wasn't a huge deal, as we got back to the harbor approximately 45 minutes after departing, so we still had most of a beautiful day ahead of us.

We should have listened

when he told us to beware

of the rough seas.