Last Riffs and Testament

For those not used to my riffs, they are a collection of random thoughts about the countries, customs, and people. They veer all over the road like a Swiss truck driver. I know these generalizations are probably unfair to the country and the people of that country, but tough noogies.
We’re at the airport in Geneva – boarding is in 45 minutes, so I’m trying to get some of the last couple of blog posts written before heading home. Some will have to wait till we get back to the states – the “free wireless” at the Geneva airport requires entering your mobile phone plus the country code, and with cell phones, I don’t have to memorize the country code like I once did. And, of course, the wireless card never worked. Good thing that four of the six hotels had wireless.

I should have blogged my first trip to Europe back as a college student in 1984, but Al Gore hadn’t invented the Internet yet.

I’m not saying it is the French influence (yes you are!) but the people in the German-speaking part of Switzerland were nicer than the folks in the French-speaking part. Shocking.

So, we drove lengthwise across two countries – Austria, as Vienna is far to the Eastern part of the country, and then Switzerland – entering from Liechenstein on the eastern side, and driving (eventually) to Geneva on the western border with France. We came close to making it five countries, as we came within a few klicks of the French border (they immediately surrendered) in Geneva.

Today’s Merriam-Webster’s emailed Word of the Day is “toplofty” which means “very superior in air or attitude.” The example they give us: “Our dinner guest was interesting but a bit toplofty as she recounted her adventures abroad for us.” If we speak of this trip, I will try not to be toplofty – except maybe about the paragliding.

Time for some notes on food. Well, sort of. The food on the trip was relatively decent, but rarely memorable. Our trip to Italy was been the tops for our foodie trips (wow, that’s a shock!). Spain was incredible as well, although since we went with an eight, six, and three/half year old, the foodie experience was somewhat limited, plus we hadn’t really hit that stage of our lives.

There is a reason Central Europe is known for its beer. Yes, we had some very good food – the meal the second night in Prague comes to mind, as does the first meal in Vienna (amazing Schnitzel – nothing else compared). Beyond that, there is only so much pork, veal, sausages, and potatoes one can eat. Variety may be the spice of life, but a limited menu is the choice in the three countries we ate in. So, when it came time to review our trip favs, we didn’t even bother to review the food. The best restaurant was in Prague. The most fun was in Vienna for lunch outside Hofburg Palace. The Hotel Jagdhof was quite good, and for breakfast they had a fresh orange juice squeezer and a cook making omelettes (sp?) and crepes to order. All in all, however, the meals sort of run together into a haze of pork or veal options.

Played mind games with an angry Swiss driver yesterday on the road to Geneva from Lauterbrunnen. There was construction on the A8 just outside of Bern (I think it was the A8 – they run together after a bit) and I was debating passing a large truck that was in the right lane, but the left lane was very small, and I didn’t feel comfortable passing. An angry Swiss guy in a Remax van honked, so I let him buy. As he passed, he yelled angrily. I gave him the Bronx salute (been a long time since I felt compelled to let my finger send a message to another driver). He tried to roar off, but because of construction and traffic, could not get far. He kept weaving in and out, but making little progress. Mrs. Iron Tourist nervously dubbed him Mr. Crazy Swiss Driver Man.

Once the construction ended after several miles, I stayed on his tail. As he kept switching lanes, I kept following Mr. Crazy Swiss Driver Man. Mrs. Iron Tourist noted that he could possibly have a gun. I stayed behind him so he couldn’t get a clean shot off (you know, just in case he had a gun). Finally, after 20 miles of annoying him, he took an exit, waving to me as we drove past. I clearly messed with his head.

We sent no postcards this trip. Like pay phones and typewriters, postcards are becoming a thing of the past. Well, there’s the blog and actual photos we took, so we’ve got that going for us.

Between the blackberry working everywhere, and having wireless access most of the trip, this is a far cry from 1984 when Carol and I scammed British Telecom by me giving her a different telephone number of a pay phone every few days. She would call me collect at the appointed time, and I’d accept the charges. Maybe it made us international criminals, but in college, free is good. There was the time I was hiking on the Isle of Skye and was late to the pay phone in the village center. A couple of Scots answered and had quite a good conversation with Carol. They say me hurrying up to the phone – and called out – “are you Glen?” I nodded – they said, “we’ve got Carol right here – lovely lass.”

Save your guidebooks – they are good for fact-checking the blog, reminding you of spelling difficult names (such as Swiss mountains or Vienna long-named streets), and for doing photobooks or other stuff like that upon your return to the States. The “honey-what-was-the-name-of-that-church-we-visited-in-Prague – no, no, the-fifth-church” discussion are more easily avoided if you follow my tip.

WCs are a crapshoot here – you don’t know going in whether they’ll be free or if we’ll have to pay. Again, not every European tradition is a good one.

Clothes. Okay, I know what you are thinking – “ I really need to hear about clothes from a 48 year old dad who has never been much of a fashion plate, except for those times he wore Wham thin ties in college (or maybe never at all).” But guys, hear me out. A couple of key things from the trip – in August in Eruope, cargo shorts and a short sleeve shirt are acceptable at dinner. Also, for the trip, cargo shorts are a must – particularly in cities infamous for pickpockets, like Prague or Barcelona (2009 trip). Plus you need to have extra pockets while sightseeing. Mine had lots of extra pockets, into which went all sorts of coins, reading glasses for menus I couldn’t understand, wallet in a zippered pocket, blackberry in a zippered pocket, and random other stuff acquired on the walkabouts.

The other must are zippered hiking shorts. The kind where you can unzip the lower legs when the day heats up on the mountain, and then you can always put back on if you need long pants for dinner or as the day cools off. While your oldest college-bound daughter who shall go unnamed may mock you for wearing them, they really are quite handy – plus she’s going to criticize whatever I wear, so why not make myself happier and her even more embarrassed. But this isn’t about me, it’s about my clothing tips to you.

Beyond that, a pair of good hiking boots, sneakers, and quick drying wicking shirts come in very handy. I left my hiking boots in the Geneva airport hotel because it is time for new ones – but I did get away wearing them while wearing an ankle brace so as not to hurt my ankle further. I also wore my Wintergreen pullover often – between the chilled mornings and rain, there was plenty of occasion. The last observation – bring at least two backpacks – a big one for the key electronic gear, and then a smaller one for the camera, guidebooks, and other day carry-alongs.

I know I’ve ranted a bit about the cost of meals here, but even in our airport hotel everything was expensive – 30 Swiss francs each for the breakfast buffet. The buffets are better than at hotels in the States, but most of the time it is folded into the price. Had I known it would cost over $200 dollars for breakfast for five, I would have overpaid for croissants at the airport instead and saved $100. I’m serious – I don’t know how Europe can sustain herself at these prices. I first noted it in Ireland in 2003, and then in Greece in 2009. I thought the prices in Italy were high, but at least variable. Not as nice places clearly cost less, but in Czech Republic, Austria, and Switzerland I thought the prices were high EVERYWHERE we looked. While there (mercifully) are no Applebees here (although we saw TGIFriday’s in both Prague and Vienna, proving that hell is all around us too), I was surprised at the lack of affordable restaurants.

Of course, what little news I’m getting from the States is divided thusly: 25% London burning, 25% Obama’s problems, 25% stock market turmoil, 15% Euro troubles, and 10% Yankees winning.

So, my brother Rod, who is likely responsible for nearly all – but not all – of the anonymous comments on the blog, and perhaps my most faithful reader, commented in an email that he would love to do a similar travel blog, but between the trip and working whilst on the trip, wouldn’t have time.

My semi-public (“semi-public” because, let’s face it – there might be 200-250 readers of this based on the stats) response is -- it is hard to do the blog, but definitely fun. I have gone back at times to read the various write-ups – be it of Costa Rica to suggest things to do to friends going there, or of Israel to prod my memory before one of the several unions our bipartisan group has had (usually featuring copious amounts of storytelling and alcohol). Most of all, I hope it gives the girls a chance in 30 years or so to go back and relive some fond childhood memories of our every other year big trips. Thanks for reading – hope you enjoy it.

We’ve been going on these trips since 2001, when we went during Spring Break (actually a few days early) to Spain. Torie was only 3 yrs and 9 months old. That trip went well, and the girls have been great travelers ever since. Hopefully they’ve learned that traveling is broadening, and not to be intimidated even if they can’t speak the language – bump along like a stick in a raging river, and eventually you’ll get where you are going, and will have learned a lot and had fun along the way.

We’ve had lots of nice times along the way – and points where one of us has snarled at the others. That happens on trips, particularly during the stress of events like trying to find the airport hotel in Geneva when the street can’t be found on the GPS and the hotel isn’t very near the airport and the guy at the hotel is giving halting directions with a French accent that makes him hard to understand. Not that this actually happened, but if it did, Mr and Mrs. Iron Tourist may have yelled at each other. Those storms pass quickly though, and the overall experience is bounding for the family and fun overall.

I’m writing this Wednesday morning/afternoon on the plane. We drop Julia off in two days at the University of Virginia so she can begin her first year. This trip has the feeling of the end of an era – who knows in two years if she’ll be able to come along – or even want to. As this process unfolded, I (and Carol) have been happy for her – we both loved our college years, and know Julia will as well. But now I do feel a bit of sadness – we’re moving on to the next, somewhat less predictable stage of our life. I hope we get to do this type of trip again.

Changing topics, it’s time for some Hotel Rankings:

1. The Jagdhof in Neustift. Yes, it was expensive. But, unlike some hotels on the trip, they did everything very well, and we also had the feeling we were in the Tyrolean Alps from the views, the décor, and the food. They tried to make sure the details were done right – you paid more, but you also got more. The rooms were great. Carol and the girls thought the costumes the staff wore were a little cheesy, but I was fine with them. The only downside is that they should have a compendium of all there is to do in the area, including all hiking options. Very good, but not as detailed as what we found in Lautterbrunnen. The breakfast was the best. The girls want to go back – Maddy thinks it would be swell for her to bring some friends there to celebrate her 18th birthday whilst skiing. Keep dreaming, kid.

2. The Hermitage in Lucerne. Not the best room (no AC, although it did cool down at night), but the location/view was hard to beat – Lake Lucerne and Mt. Pilatus right out our window. The room was good enough, and Carol and I liked hitting the hotel bar after coming back from dinner in town – we relaxed outside, sitting on the patio overlooking the lake and mountain. Hard to beat.

3. Das Tyrol in Vienna. It was close to the main sights, had a much better breakfast than in Prague, and had wireless.

4. U Pava Hotel in Prague: It would have been better if the staff actually gave a crap, but the rooms were quaint (which also means small) and the hotel was well-situated between Old Town and Prague Castle. We felt at home after just one day in the neighborhood. Smoking in the lobby has got to go, and the breakfast could be upgraded a bit.

5. The Silberhorn in Lauterbrunnen. This finished last (not going to count the airport hotel – that was just a place to sleep before heading home) because they went the opposite of the Jagdhof. Small towels, cheap packets of shampoo, small rooms. The food was good, and the garden is beautiful, so it’s not all a negative – but can’t recommend it because their business model is to cut corners, and it showed.