Thursday, July 28, 2022

Well, This Is Pretty Cool

 After Saturday's near fiasco in the heat of Milan, it was time to go someplace cool.  My plan had been to take the gondola up from Stresa to Mount Mattarone, a 4,500 foot high mountain.

We switched to Plan B.  Literally "switched" (Editor: Is this dramatic foreshadowing? Blogger: Ah, you know my tricks!).  It turns out the gondola is permanently closed.  In May 2021 a tram crashed to the ground after a traction cable snapped just below the summit.

According to Wikipedia:

"Normally, a pneumatic safety brake would have stopped the runaway car immediately but the cable car was operating illegally with the brake disabled. The crash killed fourteen passengers in the cable car, and seriously injured one child."

(It's amazing the one child lived.)

So instead we decided to drive up to the top.  It was a white knuckle drive, full of switchbacks (Editor: ah, there's the "switch"! Blogger: Nothing gets past you!).  The road was, to my surprise, lined with houses much of the way up.  I was expecting a pastoral drive through forests and fields, which did happen, but closer to the top of the mountain.  

The homes lining the road were pretty, but it was hard to focus on that whilst driving up the switchback roads as cars and bikes came careening down at me.  At the same time, I had to pick my spots to pass the bikers laboring up the mountain.  

I half expected to see James Bond flying past me on the other side of the road on his way back to Stresa, followed closely by a fleet of bad guys on motorcycles shooting at him.  It didn't actually happen, but it could have on those switchbacks.  Then, he'd walk up to our hotel bar and order a martini, shaken, not stirred.

We weren't the only ones who had the idea to drive to the top of the mountain for cooler weather.  It was mid-70s and low humidity, compared to a blazing mid-90s down by the lake.  On a less hazy day, the views would have been spectacular.  

As it were, the views were pretty impressive, but haze does not translate into good picture taking.  So when I tell you the views of the two lakes -- Lake Maggiore and Lake d'Orta -- and the Alps were awesome, you'll have to trust me.  Oh, I'm still including some photos, but they don't do the views justice, thanks to the haze.

Just to the left of this mountain
spur, you can make out Lago
d'Orta through the haze.

Alas, you can't even see the
grand views of the Alps.

One of the many restaurants,
and the top of Mottarone.

Another spur of the mountain.

Anyhow, the place was packed.  Parking was hard to find, and people were wandering the road and the trails.  It felt like a party, as European mountain tops with restaurants and good access often do.  There are at least six restaurants and one cafe on top of the mountain, and they were all doing a bang up business, except for one of them.

Carol and I might have been the only Americans up there.  We heard many languages, but the English spoken was with a strong British accent.  Besides Italian, we heard lots of French and German, very little Spanish, and then some of the cats and dogs languages of Europe that are Germanic-adjacent, but are probably Scandinavian. 

After a bit, we tried to get seated at one essentially empty restaurant, but were shooed away because we didn't have a reservation.  Just as well, because the restaurant we were able to get a table at was a gem.  It felt like the people's restaurant.

It felt like a party was going on.  We ordered the charcuterie board for two.  As much as I wanted a beer, I didn't want to hike, or, especially, drive down the mountain after one.  So I made do with cold and refreshing frizzante, which is the Italian word for sparkling water.

They don't cheat you on charcuterie on top of a mountain in Italy.  The meats were delicious and the cheese was great.  There were seven different meats and four difference cheeses.  It also came with a big pizza crust (no sauce) drizzled in olive oil for the bread.  It was the tastiest charcuterie I've ever had.

It was so good I had to
include two pictures!

After lunch we hiked around, including to the top of the mountain.  Just below the top is the wonderfully named "Alpyland," which might be the best name ever.  It should co-market with "Opryland" and then they'd really have the best branding.

("When in Europe -- go to Alpyland!  When in America -- go to Opryland!" If the agency from "Mad Men" is hiring, I'm available!)

"Alpyland" is a nearly four thousand foot long coaster track with two person cars that zip up and down the twisty, windy track.   Standing at the top, hearing the screams from below, was good fun.  The line waiting to pay and use "Alpyland" persuaded me not to go, but the name "Alpyland" will forever hold a place in my heart! 
Just above my right shoulder you
can sort of see the last uphill at 
Alpyland.  Also, in the distance,
past the peaks above our heads,
you can see Lake Maggiore.

There was a little Alpyland cafe at the top, so we bought more water, sat at a picnic table, and admired the view.

A mountain trail.

Mountain wildflowers.

One of the multitude of chairlifts
that climb the mountain from
all directions.  The Lake is in
the background.

To the left, Isole Madre.  In the 
foreground, Isole dei Pescatori.

Lago d'Orta. . .Mount Mottarone is
in between the two lakes, known
as the Twin Lakes, even if they
aren't named Lake Elizabeth
and Lake Marie.

The ringing of their cowbells alerted
Carol to their presence.

Refreshed by the great meal, the hike, the cooler mountain air, and learning that there is a place named "Alpyland" in this world, we drove back down the mountain.  For some reason, going down wasn't as white knuckle as going up, so it was a pretty pleasant drive down the mountain and back to our hotel.

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